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Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Baby Girl or Boy Lucas

Steph writes:
My husband and I are pregnant with our first child together, due July 27th, and we do not know the gender.

This is the second marriage for both of us, and we have three other children. My son and daughter, Christopher Zachary (10), and Emily Rose (8), and my stepdaughter Amanda Morgan (11).

I looked it up, and all of our children's names are in the Top 20 for their respective birth years. They have all gone through elementary school being Chris C., Emily C., and Amanda L., something I didn't think through when I was pregnant my first two times around, and something I really want to avoid now. My name preferences have changed so much since then, as have my husband's.

Some names on our list now include (in order of how much we like them)

Charissa (Cuh-riss-uh)


These are just some names we have thought of, not our final list of names to choose from. We like all these names, but none stand out as the right name for our baby. That's where we're hoping you can help.

Problem one: all the names we like are very different styles, so we can't really narrow down on one and find more names like that to eventually find the perfect name.

Problem two: they're all very different from our children's names, and as there is such a big age gap, the kids will be the baby's half siblings, and the baby already has a different last name than Chris and Emily (the last name he/she will have is Lucas, by the way), we feel like with such a different style of name there will be too much separation? Do you think so?

So we're hoping you can help us find a name that's not very popular and has the same style as the names we've mentioned, but still works with Chris, Emily, and Amanda.


Blended families raise so many interesting issues, as do age gaps. Two things you have going for you: the children from the first two families have such very compatible names, and you and your husband have such similar tastes now. One thing you have going against you: again, that the children from the first two families have such very compatible names. If you had, say, Margaret Elizabeth and Edmund John, and he had, say, Starshine Tulip, we would just throw in the towel at this point and tell you to pick ANY name because NO name is going to join these names in a seamless way. Instead, we have three children whose names go BEAUTIFULLY together, which makes it trickier to change styles at this point.

But not at all impossible: for one thing, because of the change in family situation, NOBODY is going to be thinking, "Huh, THAT'S weird, wonder why they just changed styles on a dime like that?"

A name that comes to mind for a girl is Briony. It can be pronounced like the name Brian with an ee-sound on the end or it can be prounounced like BREE-uh-nee, and I prefer BREE-uh-nee. I think Amanda, Christopher, Emily, and Briony goes just fine, and Briony is similar to Bree on your list.

For a boy, I wonder if you'd like Milo? Amanda, Christopher, Emily, and Milo.

Or Keegan: Amanda, Christopher, Emily, and Keegan.

You know, I just had another idea. It's probably a TERRIBLE idea. But...I wonder if you could enlist the help of the first three children in choosing a name for the fourth? If nothing else, this would let you explain the different style in a SUPER SWEET way. The problem, of course, being that the children might only like names you don't like, and vice versa. And I'm remembering how my two older children icked and ucked every! single! name! mentioned while we were trying to name the younger three. Maybe forget I said anything.

All right, I'm going to turn this over to the collective mind now---this is such a hard one!


Barb @ getupandplay said...

You have a lot of great options on the list! My favorites are Wyatt, Hazel and Britta.

Just a thought on name "style" meshing with the older three siblings' names. It's probably something they won't notice, at least not immediately. I remember at that age, "styles" of names were all about real-life examples of families I knew, rather than historical or cultural associations. Their little sister or brother's name will belong with their names because they will have a real-life example.

Christine said...

From your lists I like Valentina, Hazel, Lana and Vera best for a girl, I also like Charissa, but prefer the spelling Carissa, just to avoid confusion. I think these all sound fine with your prior children's names. I feel like some of the names (Piper, Honor, and Sage, namely) might stick out a little much with the other names, but work still as a middle.

For boys I like Griffith, Everett and Sawyer best.

As for separate suggestions, for a girl Camille or Camilla, Robin, or Melanie...

And for a boy, maybe Emmett?

Good luck!

Carolyn said...

I wouldn't worry about styles because there's such an age gap. I like Honor, and I'd suggest Honora (On-NOR-a)because you could use the nn Nora if you wanted to have an unusual name but a nn that blends with the older siblings.

Other ideas:
Calla (as in Calla Lily), nn Callie
Britta is pretty, and I also knew a little girl named Britton.

Anonymous said...

I wouldn't stray too far away from the more traditional names you already have. for girls, maybe consider-Emilin.

For a boy, i would use Wyatt or Hudson from your list. Oh, or Heath.

Good luck! Whatever you decide, it will be great name!

Swistle said...

I'd say Emilin is too close to Emily. Which reminds me of something I forgot to put in the post: I think Charissa may be too close to Christopher.

StephLove said...

I really love Vera for you. It fits the same general naming style as the others but it's more off the beaten track, plus it has a nice meaning (truth).

Similarly, from the boys' list I like Cedric and Everett.

Some more suggestions:

For girls, you might do another flower name to tie in with your daughter's middle name. Jasmine, perhaps? Or whatever pick your favorite flower, or maybe a flower used in your wedding.

For boys, you might consider Alexander (nn Xander), a traditional name with a more offbeat nickname.

Or Davis (an surname like Sawyer). You might like the alliteration of Davis Lucas, or you might hate it. Quinn is a favorite of mine you could use for a girl or boy.

Or back to boys-- Zane. It's spunky, but not too out there.

Good luck!

Anonymous said...

From you list of names I think these would blend in the most, but I agree with others, that this might not be such a big issue, as the names on your list are still heard of and not completly mad :-)
For girls I like Lyra, Hazel, Lyla (spelled Lila), Willow, Hollis (maybe Holly?), Myla (maybe Maya?) and Vera.
Oh, and I think Charissa would be too close to Christopher, but how about Clarissa?

For boys I like Everett, Sawyer and Tad, but I'd prefer it as a nn for a full name like Thaddeus. Oh, h´how about Theodore nn Theo?

Good luck!

Kelley said...

Perhaps tell the kids that you'd like their help with the middle name? This way if they come up with something off the wall, you can use it in the middle, and have the super sweet story, without any feelings getting hurt. But if they come up with something good, then it gets a surprise promotion to first name spot!

The Mrs. said...

Vera seems as classic as Amanda, Chris, and Emily... but without the popularity.

Otherwise, both of your girl names begin with a vowel... have you considered going with that option again? Iris, Ivy, Evelyn, Arden?

For a gentleman, Griffin has some weight behind it (nicknames could be Griff or Finn). Isaac or Michael are steady names with snappy and familiar 'Ike' as a nickname.

Best wishes to the six of you!

Anonymous said...

With all due respect, I feel I have to speak up about the name Briony/Bryony and its proposed pronunciation (forgive me, dear Swistle!)
As a lifelong friend of a Bryony (pronounced BRYE-uh-nee, not BREE-uh-nee), I have long loved the name and have never heard the other pronunciation used, unless in error. The name's well established in the UK. I know the Baby Name Wizard says you can pronounce it either way but as the name comes from that of a botanical (it's a vine) it would be a bit like saying you can pronounce Violet as VEE-o-let...well I suppose you's VI-o-let.
But perhaps I am wrong? Are there any Bree-uh-nees out there who would beg to differ?

Emily S. said...

From your girls' names i really like Kalia, Lyla, Piper, Hollis. Instead of Vera, what do you think about Veda (like from My Girl)?
From your boys' names I really like Sawyer the best. Lian would be confused with Liam which is growing in popularity. I also like Asher, and Keane. You have a good list.... just have to narrow it down. I feel like you may like a lot of these names, but cross out the ones you can't imagine calling over and over again :)

Adey said...

We named our daughter Nolana.
I saw you had Lana on your list and wasn't sure if you were thinking of pronouncing it "LAN-Ah" or "Lawn-Ah".
Our daughter's name is pronounced "No-Lawn-Ah" and we call her Lana "Lawn-ah" for short.

I think it suits her wonderfully and it was the perfect compromise for my husband and I! Unique and yet not crazy.

Just thought I would suggest that!
(P.S. We just had a boy in June and named him Carson! Perhaps you would like that too...)