I am pregnant with my 5th and last child, a girl, due at the end of July. We have a name we LOVE, beginning with a ‘B’. We also have a middle name we love beginning with the letter ‘R’. We would be all set to go if our last name did not begin with an ‘A’, which makes her initials BRA! My mom suggested switching the first and last names and then going by her middle name which would make her initials RBA. I sort of like the idea, but I don’t like the idea of a lifetime of correcting people and the headache of official documents confusion. What would you do? Should I pick a brand new middle Name? Are the BRA initials really that terrible? My other daughter’s initials are GAA ,which is kind of funny, but we have never monogrammed anything nor thought about it much. Help!
I would not want those initials myself (I'd be fine with GAA). But I also wouldn't want to switch the names only to solve the initials problem. I can see why you're stuck!
I think it boils down to what part of the name is most important to you. One of these three things will have to happen: (1) You will give her the BRA initials, OR (2) You will swap the two names, OR (3) You will choose a new middle name to avoid both #1 and #2. Each possibility has a downside, and so it's a matter of choosing the downside you mind least---which probably is a question of how important this particular middle name is to you.
Since none of your first four children have swapped first/middle names, my sense of order rebels at the idea of suddenly switching them for this child, and I would vote for option #3. Another possibility is to give her two middle names (I'd make the R-name the second of the two middle names, since many forms default to the first of two middle initials); this still bothers my sense of order, but not as much, and I think it might be possible to come up with an excuse that explains it ("She's our last, and we still had more names we couldn't bear not to use!" or "She's the last one, but we still had two important women to honor!"). I guess that counts as a fourth option, then, but it's also kind of a subset of option #3.
Let's have a poll over to the right to see what everyone else would do. [Poll closed; see results below.] It's a little bit of a tricky thing to have a poll on, though, since it depends on strength of preference. For example, if you're okay switching the middle name, I vote for doing that---but if you are completely set on using the middle name, then I vote for adding a second middle name. Perhaps in the comments section we can clarify our votes if necessary.
Poll results for "What would you do about the initials BRA?" (419 votes total):
Go ahead and use them - 123 votes (29%)
Switch first and middle names and call by middle name - 24 votes (6%)
Choose a different middle name - 177 votes (42%)
Add a second middle name - 89 votes (21%)
I can't decide - 6 votes (1%)